政治白痴

October 18, 2014

1977年, 四人幫被打倒, 加拿大第一个旅行團回国参觀, 因包括我在內有數位是教書的, 所以稱為加拿大華人文化團. 其實大部份是文化不高的老華僑, 到了杭州有人說到北京了, 笑話多多, 如桂林漓江不及廣东三水飄亮等.
因我門是加拿大第一个華人文化團回国参觀, 到處都受到高級招待, 每市的革命委員会都設讌款待, 照例是首先批判四人幫的可惡, 跟着要團友發言, 我亦勉為其難祝願祖国日益強大等等.
到了北京, 招待我門的是中旅社的李副主任, 他一身黑衣黑衭, 甚為突出,倍我門遊北海公園, 小休時他坐在我身旁, 就交談起來, 我對打倒四人幫之事已極厭惡, 就說: 中国人太不成熟了, 国家主席了劉少奇竟会變成工賊, 賣国賊, 叛徒. 英明的林副主席也成了叛徒, 四人幫亦成階下囚. 為何每次權力交替必是成王敗寇. 三四千年來毫無寸進, 真有些政治白痴. 看人家美国只有ニ百多年歷史, 尼克信總統剛因醜聞引咎下台, 国家一片風平浪靜, 這才是政治成熟的表現,值得中国人学習.
李副主任听後面色難看, 啞口無言. 我門跟着去其它景点.
兩年後朋友的旅行團又由李副主任招待, 交談起來他還記得我的大胆言論呢.

我的近況;

October 12, 2014

各位朋友
過去一个月, 由於每天都要抽一公升的肺積水,( 護士上門抽) 最多的一天抽了2.3公升, 身体極疲弱,不能說話,行動, 身体暴瘦了六公斤.
六天前医生加重了化療藥, 用以壓制肺瘤, 果然見效, 這數天肺積水急降至每天只剩一, ニ百ML, 希望很快能降至零.
可惜化療藥諸种副作用亦同時到來, 消化不良, 皮膚脫落, 內分泌失調,身体又極疲弱. 希望觧决了肺積水後, 可減輕藥量, 又可重新做人.

其实我已很幸運, 腎癌患者一般只有三年命, 我己是四年多, 上次的化療藥我用了三年才失效, 而一般的化療藥有效期是6-9个月.
希望這新藥又能給我帶來兩三年的時間, 那就可算是奇蹟了.

十分感謝各位的關心.
祝健康愉快.
半立

低B比諭

September 25, 2014

上帝是陶匠, 我們是他手里的泥土, 他有杈把我們打碎重塑. 這是他的杈利.

此說我听過多次, 但不成理由,

泥土是死物, 無感性.

人有生命, 感性, 與陶坭不可同日而言. 你会把自已當作石頭木塊嗎?

尋道

September 25, 2014

耶穌說; 找尋,你就會得着.

尋道沒有捷徑.
但不要依賴他人, 外力, 路要自已走, 不然永被人牽着鼻子,不能自主.
你心中若有太陽,何懼外出風雨如晦.

每个人都有不同的心路歷程, 我的經驗可能不適合別人.
共勉之.

有特色的十字架像

September 22, 2014

DSC06578因我尊崇耶穌的寬恕与博愛, 在各地旅行, 常尋求有特色的十字架像, 這是其中數款.

左起
第一个兩指指天, 不知何意.. 購自意大利西西利島.
第ニ个 購自丹麥
第三个 購自德国
第四个 購自愛爾蘭
第五个 購自阿根庭, 由歺叉改成, 很有創意.

我是;

半個基督徒–反對上帝的專制与殘暴,但擁戴耶穌的寬恕与博愛.

半個佛教徒–討厭佛廟的烏煙瘴氣,但敬佩佛學的智慧.

半個儒學徒–反對腐化了的儒家禮教,但尊崇原始儒家仁,義之理.

半個共產党–反對其專制獨裁手段,但支持其天下為公的均富理念.

林半立,

OLD BLACK JOE

September 20, 2014

PAUL ROBESON-OLD BLACK JOE.wmv

I remember when I was a few years old, my mom used to hum this song O Black Joe to me, at that time I did not realize it was quite a sad song.

Gone are the days when my heart was young and gay,
Gone are my friends from the cotton fields away,
Gone from the earth to a better land I know,
I hear their gentle voices calling “Old Black Joe”.
I am coming, and my head is bending low..

My mom came from a well to do family, when she was young, she was sent to study piano at the Shanghai music academy with her chaperon, may be that’s where she learnt this song.
Later, the communist took over China and they threw her in jail for 18 months without any charge, me and 3 other siblings age 2 to12 end up living on the street and almost died, when she was let out everything we owned were taken away, I remembered we slept on the floor using newspaper as mats.( please go to http://standingforest.wordpress.com/ English articles ..mother..for more detail).

She’s obviously in great stress and may be found some comfort in singing OLD BLACK JOE.
Although my parents lived into their 80’s and 90’s, because of all the social upheaval and the communist’s inhumane policies, our family was always torn apart, and I don’t think the six of us ever spent more than 3,4 years staying together, I was the lucky one and lived with mom for about 16 years, but because of my restless and rebellious nature, regrettably I don’t think I gave her much peace of mind to cherish.

Now that I am facing my own end and contemplating about Euthanasia,
Listening to this song and thinking of mom, tears swell up in my eyes…

……………………………………………………..
PAUL ROBESON 1898-1976, was an amazing achiever, he was a lawyer, professional football player, singer, actor and civil rights activist..

September 19, 2014

<基督徒的排他性思维,抬高自己,就是一种恶>

基督徒最可惡又可憐之處, 就是自以為擁有唯一真理, 真神, 傲慢又閉塞, 見到在任何不同信仰的就指為異端邪說. 給人類帶來無休止的糾紛與苦難.
我更可憐他們的閉塞使他們自絕於世上其它多姿多采的文化, 風俗. 夏威夷土著本過着無拘無束天堂般的生活, 卻被傳教士指為罪惡必須悔改. 還有中国開明多元的宗教觀, 印度超越式的智慧, 南北美洲土著自成一体的文明, 愛斯基摩, 非洲等貼近大自然的獨特文化, 竟都被視作垃圾必須剷除改造, 這是多麼的殘酷自大無知,缺乏對人類基本的愛與關怀.
他們打着愛與和平的旗幟, 到處攻擊他人,破壞了人類大家庭的和諧共處, 犯了嚴重的侵害人類罪, 實是罪大惡極.
半立

另一悲劇問題

September 14, 2014

為信仰, 全人類的福祉而自我犧牲者都是偉大的靈魂, 很多聖戰份子,純真的共產信仰者, 紅衞兵都值得我們的尊敬,

至於他們是否好心做坏事, 宣揚專制獨裁唯一真神, 真理, 這是另一悲劇問題.

半立

wrestling with the beast

September 13, 2014

Western art, religion and literature all have a lot to do with the struggling of the good and bad, right and wrong.

The Chinese has transcended this dualistic struggle long ago;

Know the white , keep the black. Embrace the yang, carry the ying…Tao De Ching.

Holding to one view is an extremist, holding to both views is a saint…Confucian.

One is all, all is one…Buddha.

That’s why In the last two thousand years, Jews, Buddhist, Christians, Taoist, Muslims all have settled and coexisted peacefully in China.

IMG_5774

Loahan playing with the tiger. 羅漢玩虎

September 13, 2014

loahan—a highly spiritual person, monk.

Tiger—the wild,animal nature in all of us.

Usually loahan was depicted sitting on top or taking a nap with the tiger, showing he had tamed his animal nature.

This Loahan not only tamed it, but has become it’s friend and playing together in harmony , he has become one with nature, no more dualistic good and bad struggles.

I see my cancer as the tiger and would have love to play with him, but unfortunately I am not that enlightened and end up often bitten by the tiger.

lap

羅漢玩虎
虎, 代表人之獸性, 一般的羅漢像是坐在虎旁, 或與老虎一起睡大覺,說明自已的獸性已被馴服.

但這个羅漢玩虎不但已收服獸性,更與它成了好朋友,和諧相處,人與自然合而為一, 不分彼此,一即一切.

而西方宗教, 文学, 芸ボ,則常以善與惡,生與死,上帝與摩鬼對立的两元論, 作永無休止的鬥爭,永遠不能與大自然和諧合一.
中国人的智慧早在兩千多年前就超越了簡樸糼稚的两元對立論,
提出;
知其白, 守其黑. 負其陰,抱其陽…老子
執其一端為異端, 執其兩端為聖人…程灝
一即一切, 一切即一…彿.
…………………………………………..
我視我的癌瘤如老虎, 很想與它和諧相處, 可惜因道行不足, 常被它咬傷.
半立

IMG_5776


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